I Hate It Whenever

... I gain more weight than intended.

... somebody tries to imitate me for the Nth time.

... a father forgets his daughter and prefers a night out with friends and goes home drunk.

... there's an idiot in front of our car causing a traffic jam.

... people come late.

... an event starts late.

... someone who lied but proven guilty still insists he's innocent.

... people make up excuses.

... people promise me something, A VERY SIMPLE THING, but then forgets all about it like it's no big deal.

Early Christmas

Do you know what never goes out of style?

SHOPPING!!!

After attending the Holy Mass at 11am, my mom took me, my sisters, and my husband to lunch and shopping today (I never thought she had all that dinero, LOL) and we had a BLAST! And the best part about it is that Jai got these really awesome Chuck Taylors.

It took him a while before he made up his mind about which ones to get. Who could blame him? We were swimming in an ocean of shoes! Jai has never been really a shopping spree person, but this time I could sense that he was as excited as I was. There were just sooo many to choose from. But after a gruesome deliberation he narrowed it down to 3 pairs and then finally landed on these. I believe he made the perfect choice! The model also came with free black laces so we asked the salesman to do a trick combining the blacks & whites. Now Jai's new kicks look so much more extra cool.

Of course I never left the mall empty handed myself. I got a blue dress and shiny black sandals to wear on Christmas day, and a pair of sneakers for casual everyday use. But I have to say, the favorite thing I bought was a pink Precious Moments baby bag. Now I can really prepare for stuff to take to the hospital!

So thanks for the shopping date, Mommy & Daddy! It's like nothing has changed through the years. When I was younger, my younger sisters and I always had brand new clothes to wear on Christmas day and it gives me a warm fuzzy feeling that my parents still think of me as one of their babies even though I'm married and pregnant now. And what's more touching is that they treat my husband as a son they never had and wish they had.

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas--inside and out!

The Pregnancy Diaries 5

Thirty weeks pregnant and growing impatient. You've probably heard that time flies when you're having fun, right? Well maybe that's why it feels like I've been pregnant forever. The third trimester isn't so fun anymore.

But is it normal to feel this way? All sources say YES and I'm relieved to know that I'm not crazy. Staying home still leaves me exhausted at the end of the day and what's worse is that even bedtime won't give me a break. It's hard finding a comfortable sleeping position when your entire body is in pain. My daughter also likes to kick my bladder hard in the middle of the night which is just great because I'd have to get up to pee and try to fall back to sleep again.

Don't get me wrong, I'm still as excited as ever but now the mixed emotions about the upcoming birth of my baby girl are stirring at a faster pace. I'm STILL dreading labor pains which I'm sure wouldn't even compare to the pains I'm having right now. Reading about it and talking about my fears with my support group just can't seem to help. There's always an option of getting a painless vaginal delivery with the help of an epidural anesthesia (I'm hoping for a normal spontaneous delivery) but even that poses risks for me and the baby. I might not know when to push because knowing when the contractions are happening may be difficult to tell. I won't be feeling any pain and according to a friend in some cases it all comes down to a cesarian section.. which is even worse than getting a destroyed stitched up vajayjay.

On a lighter note, last month we went shopping for some of the baby's first needs. My husband and I were very excited and we had fun choosing designs of all sorts of baby stuff. We decided on sticking to a single brand just so everything is theme coordinated. On the same day we also bought a bigger bed and a couple of new pillows to accommodate our soon to be expanding family.

Which reminds me.. this is gonna be the first Christmas that I won't be spending with my parents and sisters. It's my first Christmas as a married woman and an expectant mother at that. I'll be spending the Holidays with my husband and in-laws because (1) my mom and sisters will be flying to Vietnam to spend Christmas with my dad and (2) it's one of those things you do when you're already married. Having two families means sharing occasions fairly. I'll surely miss my family on Christmas, but I'm looking forward to spending New Year's eve with them. My dad's coming home with my mom and sisters after Christmas so on New Year's eve all of us are gonna be together and we're gonna be a complete family again. It's just too bad my dad will be leaving the country before my baby arrives though.

Going back to my pregnancy issues, most of the time my mind is elsewhere. Maybe I'm just too stressed out, I don't know. I've never had this much difficulty in grasping ideas and putting them into writing. The hormones are driving me out of my mind and shoving the worries down my throat. Right now I can't even make a decent exit. So now.. err.. here's my exit.

True Love Doesn't Age

I really admire my grandparents' marriage. They've been married for 50+ years and they're still going strong. Lolo was admitted (again) in the hospital and today my husband and I paid a visit to see him.

I was so touched to see how my grandparents were with each other; my lola covering him with a blanket whenever it hung loose, caressing his back, feeding him food and giving him water, and even the simplest reassuring touch of hand was enough proof that LOVE is real and true love lasts FOREVER. <3

I am optimistic that the unbreakable bond that I have with my husband will just be as good as that.

Seeing Red

Hi. Well as of now I feel like shit and I'm in a very foul mood. I have 0% appetite and I don't like to lie down, sit down, or stand up. The heat of the afternoon sun is getting on my nerves but I hate it even more when it rains because apparently, from last night's experience, rainfall ruins a perfectly good pedicure. My uterus is contracting every once in a while not to mention the baby tossing and turning inside while it happens. Which is just great. Really great.

I hope you understand that whenever I look like shit, I feel like shit, and my whole world turns into crappy shitty shit.

Cozy Coffee

What a relief! According to Babycenter preggos can still enjoy a cup of caffeinated bliss as long as they, I mean we don't overdo it. I've always loved coffee. I used to be employed in a call center and during graveyard shifts (which happens almost all the time) I always brought a sachet of instant coffee and my Starbucks tumbler with me. The water dispenser and the Imeem bossa nova tracks helped make my work hours feel like leisure time.

At work, sometime in early 2009. Nung call girl pa ko. Lol.

Trivia: The tumbler was a present from Jai.

The best thing about it was the personalized cover he designed

using different photos of me. :)

My husband isn't a fan of drinking coffee and his body doesn't seem to like it either. A trip to Starbucks means a trip to the bathroom right after. I don't think I can recall one time that his bowels didn't react so violently to a Starbucks drink. But I'm proud of him. He's not ashamed to admit it. Hehe.

We Batangueños are known as the Kapeng Barako province, so it shouldn't come as a surprise to you that we like to pour coffee on our rice especially during breakfast. Before I got married my mom always prepared a mug of sweet coffee at the breakfast table. There's always one mug especially made for pouring on rice. I especially loved rice and coffee with fried food: fish, chicken, hotdog, meat loaf, longganisa, etc. It was a thing that my family has imprinted on my DNA--something I grew up with and I don't think I can ever grow out of.

For breakfast this morning I had fried rice, omelette du fromage, a tablet of ObiMin, and a glass of water (using my beloved pink Coca-Cola glass, lol) and a cup of instant 3 in 1 coffee at the side. There's just something about coffee that makes your morning extra nice.

But please, no kopi luwak for me!

A Bedtime Story

I was sitting on the bed with my laptop. He was lying in bed with his PSP. I asked Jai a question. He responded with a sneeze that almost shook the whole house. We ended up laughing so hard that I cried--partly because I thought he was mad at me for some silly reason. Anyway, the question was answered by Google and it turned out that he wasn't mad, his nose just needed to blow. This marriage is so much fun! Lol

It's times like this which makes me go, "Awww I love yooouuuu!"

Pain, Pain, Go Away

You may have read from one of my previous posts that I'm not exactly a big fan of pain. Unfortunately, pain is something that is no doubt hand in hand with pregnancy. I applaud myself for making it sound so gentle.

The leg cramp is brand new in my list of pregnancy pains. I've never had any of them before I got pregnant. Well since last week I've had two already, and now everytime I go to bed I have this fear of waking up in the middle of the night with a stabbing pain all throughout my leg. The last time this happened I couldn't walk right for a day. Waking up with a leg cramp is literally like waking up to a nightmare.

Vertigo, dizziness, migraines--you could say I've hit the jackpot on the neuro department! Earlier this week I was in headache hell for three days but thank goodness it didn't turn out to be anything too serious. I knew I should have gone to the doctor but because every move made me feel like everything was spinning, I chose to stay home and stay in bed to rest my hurting little head.

If you could only see me walking around you would probably never guess that I've been in some beauty pageants. I walk like a penguin now. No, I believe the right term is waddle. Carrying a growing baby in my huge belly leaves poise no room in the third trimester of pregnancy. Waddling like a fat bird doesn't really belong in the pain category but you know what I mean.

So yeah, for months it has been established that I'm pregnant and not crippled nor immobile. As a normal person, a loving wife, and a productive citizen of the this hopeless country, just like you I have activities of daily living or what you call ADLs. You know: chores, grooming, shopping, socializing, the whole deal of everyday life. The only difference is that in my present condition, ADLs bring fatigue up to a higher level than that of a non-pregnant person which leaves me exaggeratedly exhausted at the end of the day. The problem my friends is that when I need to sleep, I can't. I am on the borderline of the 2nd and 3rd trimesters and sleeping is becoming only a privilege. My baby is my boss. I can't do anything about her strong painful movements at bedtime and the pressure she has put on my nerves from sitting on them for the whole day starting from my lower back and from the waist down don't help lull me to sleep either.

If I were to give awards to my annoying painful episodes, I would give the back aches a 10-foot golden trophy and a gold medal to go with it. I have a feeling it will never leave me alone up until I pop this wonder baby out of me.

As unfortunate as all that may sound up there, I'm actually a very lucky woman to share all these weird, wild, and wonderful experiences with the one and only man who has never left my side all throughout this pregnancy. I'm very thankful that he's with me all the way, supporting me and making things all better. Your patience is amazing. I love you, Jai. The pain is nothing as long as you're there for me. You save me.

I guess there's nothing left for you to say other than: CONGRATULATIONS!!!